Less self-consciousness and more self-esteem

We tend to think that there is always someone looking at us, that we do not fit or that the person next to us is smarter and more beautiful than us.
17 Jul 2014 – 4:26 PM EDT

by Laura D'Ocon

We tend to think that there is always someone looking at us, that we do not fit or that the person next to us is smarter and more beautiful than us. 

According to an article published in the journal Psychological Science, they did a research where the put 69 volunteers, aged 8 to 23, in a situation in which they believed they were being observed by another person their own age and monitored the participants' emotional, body and brain responses. 

The research turn out that teens had more intense body and brain responses than children and adults. Why is that? Are teens more insecure? According to Leah  Somerville, a psychological scientist at Harvard University, the findings suggested that being watched and, to some extent, anticipating being watched were sufficient to elicit self-conscious emotional responses at each level of measurement.

Many others studies found that teens tend to worry more than adults about the way they look or act. As a recent graduate, I saw this attitude among my friends and also young co-workers. 

Is this a consequence of the American culture, that we tend to compare ourselves with models?, or is it just depending on the teenager personality? Many believe that it could be a relation between both concepts but there are also many factors that ensure this type of behavior.

 College and Universities offer different services to talk about teens' problems and difficulties for free. There are conselours and groups where you can discuss what worries or concers you. 

Summer is almost over, and this could be a stressful time for many students because they are going back to classes and they will be facing the same type of people for a whole semester. 

Furthermore, this could also be a great time to invest in yourself, -and care less about what other people think about you-. This can be sometimes hard, and some people can also be really difficult to intereact with; but if you can put up with comments and judgments that others may have about you, your life will be less stressful and more fun.

Surveys have shown that the majority of times people comment or look at each other's because they admire their work or sometimes because they are just curious. 

If you feel like someone is looking at you, smile back, -this trick is the key for success among gossipers and people that just like to comment about others.

Build your own self-esteem because no one else will do it for you, not even your parents. Here are some good advices that you can take into consideration if you like.

Talk: to a friend, to a professor that you trust, to a brother or sister or even to yourself. When you talk about your problems,you let your thoughts out and this increases your chances to find another point of view, as well as to listen to someone else's  opinion that could be helpful.

Make a list: Easy right? Write 10 things you like about yourself either physically or psychological. If you feel with enough courage share it with a friend and ask him or her what are the 10 things they like about you and vice verse.

Love: Embrace everything you are because I guarantee you there is no one like you. You are unique, special an amazing just the way you are. Embrace and yell it every morning "I Am Amazing!, if necessary. 

On the other hand, embrace other peoples qualities and abilities. This may increase your number of friends and at first, it also may seem awkward, but people will be happy that you shared kind words with them.

Less self-consciousness and more awareness about how amazing you are -and how great others can be as well-.