To be fair, all moms feel guilty. We feel guilty when we work outside the home. We feel guilty when we work inside the home. We basically have perfected the art form. No amount of logic or reason can change how we feel but here are a few ways to take the edge off.
You Wanted to Go Back to Work
So, you made the decision to go back to work after baby. Maybe you wanted the money, or the adult interaction, or the career you’d always dreamed of. Or maybe, you just needed a few hours away from the demands inside your house. That is okay. You feel guilty for looking forward to your morning latte. You feel worse when you offer to stay late to avoid the occasional bedtime chaos. There is nothing wrong with wanting a life outside of your home. In fact, it’s probably making you a better mother. Go back and re-read that last part a few times. Maybe you need to hear that more. If you chose to go back to work than it was likely the right decision for you and your family, and that is all that matters.
You Had to Go Back to Work
On the other hand, maybe you had to go back to work. Staying home with baby sounded like a dream (or at the very least, better than work) but financial responsibilities prevented you from that option and back to the office you went. You feel guilty for not staying home with baby and you’re sure that you’ve somehow stunted their development by leaving them for eight hours a day. Guess what, baby will be fine. In fact, they may master the crucial skill of learning to trust an adult besides you. This will serve you well when you want to go on a child free vacation. Affording that vacation is another reason you went back to work.
You Stayed Home
You managed to stay home with baby. Maybe it’s what you wanted or maybe it was what you felt you had to do. Either way, you’re spending your day with sweet baby and you’re feeling guilty for wondering what you’re missing. You feel guilty for craving adult interaction. You feel guilty for using the TV to get a ten minute desperately needed shower in. Your friends, who trek to work each day, think you have it made but you envy their cute clothes, important deadlines and lunch dates. This makes you feel guilty, too. Remember, you’ll never regret spending more time with baby. Even though you haven’t worn pants with a zipper in four months, you’ll cherish this time, always.
Basically, you are awesome. You’re doing your very best. So, go have a glass of wine and try not to feel guilty about that, too.