Parents don’t always share the same parenting views and values as everyone is raised differently. When this is the situation, couples need to come up with a set list of rules, discipline tactics, and strategies that they can both agree on. Some parents are more lenient on their kids and some are stricter. Kids can become very confused if one parent allows certain behavior and the other parent forbids it. So, how do you find common ground to avoid arguments with each other and causing confusion for your child?
Agree on the Smaller Issues
Things like every day discipline, manners, and rules should be agreed upon by both parents from the very beginning. When you become new parents take time to talk about how you both want to raise your child. Find an agreeable course of action you can both take and keep to this plan when your child acts out of control, is rude, or talks back. Children understand consistency and parents will receive the respect they desire if they keep to the same course of action every time.
Good Cop, Bad Cop
It isn’t fair if one parent has to fall into the disciplinary role while the other parent sits back. Parents have to show their children that they are a team and that they will not be played off each other in any way. When children see a unified front from their parents, they will follow rules and behave more accordingly.
Support One Another
Discipline and parenting isn’t easy and when one of you feel like you have had to be the disciplinary parent a bit too often, the other parent needs to step in. It isn’t fun to feel like a nag, or to be telling your child “no” all day long when they are acting out or doing things they shouldn’t be doing. It can be quite exhausting. This is where the word
team is important again and parents will be better off if they stick together throughout the journey of parenting.
How do you find common ground with your partner? Please share!